Today is a bit tongue in cheek, so please do not take offence.
This is an excerpt from the book Outliers, it is a conversation between an employee (Mr. Kim) and his boss, a division chief (Kwacang)
Kwacand : It’s cold and I’m hungry
(Meaning : Why don’t you buy a drink or something to eat?)
Mr. Kim : How about having a glass of liquor?
(Meaning : I will buy liquor for you.)
Kwacang : It’s okay. Don’t bother.
(Meaning : I will accept your offer if you repeat it.)
Mr. Kim : You must be hungry. How about going out?
(Meaning : I insist upon treating you)
Kwacang : Shall I do so?
(Meaning : I Accept)
That’s a strange conversation. But nevertheless its one that happens to be quite normal in a specific culture.
As the title states its an Asian culture. Most of Asia is receiver orientated when it comes to communication. meaning that it is up to the receiver to interpret what someone is saying to them.
Western culture has what we call a transmitter orientation. this means that the responsibility to communicate ideas clearly, are with the speaker.
Therefore my conclusion…. With regards to the slight communication gap between women and men…. Is that women have a receiver orientation and men a transmitter orientation….
What do you think?
thehonestone
This makes a lot more sense than the old Mars & Venus theory 🙂
Ha ha, maybe I should write a book on it…. 🙂
Women reinterpret even the most direct communication. We either want it to mean more or something different than it actually does.
I am sure women do, but wit relation to communicating to men, I think women expect the men to interpret what the are really saying and the divide comes because men think that women mean exactly what they say (literally).
Just a thought
very true. there is almost always an underlying meaning to what a woman says and yet with men it pretty much is what it is. women are looking into what is said while men take what is said at face value.
thanks for visiting and commenting
I could agree with that statement. I think women communicate a lot more non-verbally than men do, which makes conversations and relationships awfully complicated, sometimes. This fascinates my husband (because he’s a total nerd), but gets me into trouble with my girlfriends when I say something while thinking about something else and the combination of words and expression are misinterpreted. Sigh. One more reason to be present, in the moment, I guess.
There is always a reason to live in the moment, yet most of us almost never do…
In the Japanese language, you can say a single adjective and it will qualify as a complete sentence if there is sufficient context to know what is being described. That means if you came late to the conversation, you’ll have no idea what’s going on. It also means you can silently watch a conversation, then say a single word and it will carry the same meaning as sentence in English if said at the right moment.
It’s a bit of a jumped conclusion to say that men and women are like that too, but at a more subtle level, even between two men or two women, or an introvert and an extrovert, the notion of how you want to communicate and how much you want to communicate is always an issue, but doesn’t have to be a conflict.
I know its a stretch to apply it to women and men, but I could not resist in seeing some connection there 🙂